This is a family blog, and I don’t like to delve too much into the ins and outs of getting it in and pulling it out. There is p-hub out there who want the gory details.
That said, we’ve got 6’4″ guy that’s still fit, dutiful husband, but she’s too tired to take some D, and more importantly she doesn’t want it.
What should homie do? What does the current Red Pill say?
Mouthbreather – “Hold Frame”
Mouthbreather – “Use dread”
Mouthbreather – “Constantly improve yourself”
Mouthbreather – “Introduce competition anxiety!”
What’s he really going to do, issue a BJ ultimatum? Start hitting the clubs with his boys? Come back smelling like Scandalous or Angel by Thierry Mugler.
You really should read the comments at the instagram post. This ain’t some one off. Hoes in their cosigning like a mf’er
https://www.instagram.com/p/CAsqAT3JYyu/?igshid=da43cfvxxrkm
If she don’t want to bang, she don’t want to bang. Extracting sex out of a chick via browbeating or emotional force is bad game.
“Captain’s log: it’s been 125 days since my husband and I had sex. And I’m not any more in the mood than I was four months ago.”
His next best alternative is to “soft next” aka separate, or “hard next” and divorce her. Why hasn’t he? Aside from divorce rape and destroying the thing he’s built for his child.
When we first met I was probably half the size I am now. I had long platinum locks, boundless energy, and high libido. I jumped my husband every chance I got. In the car. At hotels. Constantly at home. I wasn’t tired. I always wanted to touch him and be touched by him.
Now? Oh my gosh, please take your hands off me! PLEASE! My 2-year-old touches me all day. And in my sleep. I loathe bodily contact now.
Fam…is there anyway my man could have predicted this?
Let’s get a bit into the solipsism.
Now, I feel like we look 10 years apart. I’m graying with wrinkles and saggy parts, and he’s pulling a Brad Pitt on me and getting better looking with age.
I don’t have any answers here. I’m not saying that Sex is the be all end all of a relationship. But this is not what my dude signed up for, not given her past track record.
I wonder if them boys over at Rollo’s site got any insight?
-Archie
Convert to Islam or become Mormon and get another wife!
True, but who says the new broad will not turn out worse? Then you have the courts and all that.
No easy answers here.
The moment she stops wanting to play ball with you, its game over between you.
@Luke
“The moment she stops wanting”
If you rely on that way of thinking you’re in trouble. She says she l owe what she wants but she doesn’t.
Bottom line is that women themselves don’t understand how attraction works, but men should learn how to understand it or they’ll end up in the same mess this guy ^^ is in. The attraction is down to you not her.
There’s a number of problems here.
Firstly the guy was 6’++ and in good condition, good looking etc. Sometimes these are the guys that fall hardest. If he was hawwwt!! And reasonably confident then he was on easy mode from the get go.
So she didn’t really need to be seduced, she sorta seduced herself in her head with his looks and mannerisms and she fell into what looked like a man that could look after her, and I mean that in the caveman sense.
But he wasn’t dominant from the outset, and he wasn’t ever “tested”.
When a baby lands it can be “all hands on deck” and society is gonna be telling him “do your shift with childcare” which is ok in bits because initially she’s gonna be exhausted and you need to strike a balance but you can over step that and become a simp. Especially if you’re incompetent with the baby; and most first time parents are petrified.
Things crop up, baby gets a temperature, mom loses her shit at every cough and sniff, but it’s probably ok and she’s looking at him, and if he’s losing his shit over it just like she is then the legs are just clamping a bit tighter right there and then. What she needs to hear is “it’ll be ok” from a man who’s not flapping and “got this”. I
If you become one of those then you fall into the paradox of being “the lovely guy she doesn’t want to bang”.
He’s probably become a cuck to the child.
Our situation was simple, when he was firstborn I earned the money and she looked after him. I did get up and do stuff but it was mainly her. I especially wouldn’t change a nappy, cos that meant cleaning up his cock, and I never touched that. I told her “I’m not touching his cock, women can do that.”
When her gf’s came round and he needed changing they’d say “doesn’t PalmaSailor do that?” And wife would say “no he wont touch his cock”. I’m like “yeah, women should do that – start as you mean to go on”.
Plus after a short break I wanted sex again, and I got it. If it slides at THAT point then all hell can go sideways and she eats the pies.
She’ll push harder and harder with the “honey do” shit “because the baybeee ” like the woman in the op will have been doing, when actually what she needs to be told is “get off your arse and do it yourself”
He will have been complying with EVERYTHING she has asked and she needs to be told “NO”. On quite a lot of fronts.
I’ve never actually had a dead bedroom to turn round but others that may be lurking have and may have more insight into the actual chess moves of doing it.
It’s gonna be along the lines of “become a bit of an arsehole” – she’ll thank you for it.
Don’t marry women in your age bracket or above.
I read it as some self-esteem issues on her part. He has high and rising “passive” SMV, her SMV is on a steep decline (at least she perceives it like that). He was her “prize” then, now “the prize” is moving away at an accelerated pace. The result? She is repulsed by her own body and the libido went to 0. The answer? He should sprinkle his “startospheric” alpha with some homely beta. Thats my reading, but I admit that’s a tough one!
Hey Archie
“I wonder if them boys over at Rollo’s site got any insight?”
Unfortunately @ Rollo has shut his comments. You might want to expand the locker room here as we’re gonna need somewhere else to hang out..
Damn, are wall gonna switch to Telegram/Signal/Mastadon?
Well have to hand out somewhere, I miss the men’s room..
Ever thought of opening up a field reports thread?
Perhaps with some bar stools and cold beer on tap 😉
Co sign. We need a men’s space. The old place over at Rooshs et al is dead.
Divorce is bad bc hell lose his kid and expensive, plus add to that if he doesn’t get this together then he’ll just get the same problem with the next woman.
If the sex is disappearing then counterintuitively he’ll be doing MOAR stuff round the house and appeasing MOAR bc THATS what he has been told he needs to do to get the attraction.
That shit has to go upside down, so yes, he does need to hit the gym, and yes he does need to buy new clothes and stay out late, and actually pull back from pushing for sex.
Basically he needs to run dread to get this back on the right foot, and after that he needs to own the frame.
I’ll bet he’s lost the dominance, and thats fatal.
What so complicated about cheating on her?
What’s up Palma and WIA…
Still waiting on that book Archie…
Palma nailed it with ” women don’t understand attraction”… They don’t. They just feel it. Or not.
She is in the or not phase.
Really a military guy is usually a service first order taker. 8 of 10 times. That and him being younger are bad signs. She is probably in the driver seat and as you know it doesn’t work that way.
But why the slam on “dread”? Dread is just another term for preselection. One cannot have too much preselection. [Sperg disclaimer – yes a guy so much in demand can have girls self eject because they feel insecure and can’t compete but that does not change the fact they still want the guy… And he has the opportunity to circle back down to her level]
If the subject started hitting some bars after momma cold shouldered him once too many you can be very sure she would take note. And her number 1 move is sex him up. Get his ass back home… Especially if her friends are saying shit like “I saw your husband last night, he looked hot” etc.
Just how it goes… What’s my man been doing for 125 days? Beating off like an incel?
The flip side is… If momma was out on a business trip and happened to stop off at the lobby bar to just check her messages and have a glass of sauv blanc… Well we’ve all met her right? And she is having no trouble feeling sexy… And that is on dude.
One more comment
Her post is really a soft next for the guy… She’s rationalizing the moving on… It’s not him it’s her you see…
She’s not a bad person and he is just a really really great guy that will make some woman happy some day. And don’t hate her! It’s just the baby…
And two months post split she is doing anal with a random dude who laughed in her face at a bar.
Nailed it.
We’re only hearing her spin on things, and have to take her word for what dude is like.
If he wants what’s best for his child he’ll do what he can to keep his family intact. Every metric we have is clear that fatherlessness is a scourage and negatively impacts children.
Good luck though, she doesn’t actively hate him yet.
Well…..
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LEvTEK1gUnI
@Sentient / Anonymous Reader
Well of all the bars in all the towns.. lol..
The following just about sums up the OP. If you remember I had the @J challenge a year or so back.
He was giving it all the usual bs on what an old fart @Palma was etc.. and I said “OK go out tonight and get a video of a woman saying ‘Palma is an arse’”
Obv. Despite his 7-8 hour head start bc I’m on GMT he didn’t manage it bc “muh.. reasons..” (sending a boy to do a mans job and all that..lol)
The bit at the end is the instructive bit about her “dilemma”.
https://vimeo.com/430944779
I’d guarantee if we didn’t have lockdown I could go out at night bar hopping and I could get that admission out of a woman every single night. So what’s up?
It leads into @Archies next post about simping.. these men are fucking pathetic and that’s why the women are out talking about their dilemma. They’re absolutely craving dominance they’re not getting at home.
It’s not even physical dominance necessarily, though that helps. On that subject I’ve been reading up on BDSM bc my current nurse likes being spanked.. at a different level from anything I’ve pushed previously.
Now I might be wrong on this but it seems that inflicting pain at a modest level gives them something like an endorphine hit (for the body to counter the pain). Then their body takes about 10 minutes to “recharge” so it’s capable of issuing another endorphine hit. But to get this you need to inflict slightly more pain than last time. So you do this which she loves more than the last time and then you give another ten minutes etc… they need to be tied down through this obv… and blindfold so they’re in “total psychological submersion” ie escapism and sensory overload bc they can’t see it coming. They have to wait – anticipate etc..
Obv the research I read was done with the woman as a Dom over the man bc.. yunnow… BUT it seems that this can be taken up and by about level six the sub is so drugged with the endorphine hits that they’re unable to even say the safe word. I’ll let you know on that.
We’re pretty much at the stage where the nurse “just has to come over” having done more and more bad things she needs punishing for – chemical addiction??
Obviously in my above example no cats were harmed, but it does put a new lite on the subject of women continually returning to very abusive men.
In other news my son cropped up the other day for a “chat” seems there’s a GURL!!! With a hawt arse… Now he knows that simping isn’t gonna get her bc we’ve done things in the field inc cold approach which has been positive – and also cold approach ‘simping’ me buying girls drinks at a bar which totally shut them down. He said “that didn’t get us anywhere dad”. He’s also spotted shit tests so watch this space, glad I was the “go to” person on this.
Feelz *are* realz to her. Emotion is a woman’s truth.
++ On your boy. I thought he’d come around when he needed you. Enjoy. And give him some space to fail or try his way first…
I wandered over from Rollo’s too. My Frame is married red pill.
It’s such a bad case study. And needs more information from the husband (and why he is so clinically retarded) to make any case at all. And doesn’t reflect on relationship game or married red pill. Or what does, or what should, or what can happen after marriage. And you can call me biased for marriage.
She is tired fatigued and angry, spinning her wheels, investing all her energy in her one child. She’s acting poorly. I can guarantee she is treating her husband like a child. And he is accepting that role.
Best way ever to not have sex for four months. Treat your husband like your child. And have him accept that role. No mom wants to fuck their child. That’s incest and she obviously has no desire to because of the way she intentionally treats him.
From one of her other articles: Dear Husband Suddenly Working From Home, I’ve Got This–
“But dear, you’ve stepped into my office now, and honey, I’ve got this.
Our home, this home, your temporary workspace—this is my domain.
Your laptop set up at our kitchen table means you’re officing out of my world now.
I’ve run this ship for years. I know the routines that help us run efficiently. I know when I can unload the dishwasher while the kids are distracted or resting. I know the best time to check the mail. I know how to make this place run on time and how to get the best possible output from myself.
And dear, you’re kind of in my way.”
And here’s how she sees him from her mommy lenses in another one of her so called articles:
“I am more alone now as a stay-at-home mom during quarantine than I was a single woman fresh out of college. My husband is home with us and while I don’t forget to count our blessings for this, it feels like he just . . . exists. He’s as lifeless as I am. He’s a roommate who gets his snacks and goes off to work or the home office, or who eats his dinner silently while messing around on his phone. He hardly speaks.”
Later in the same article she states she suffers from anxiety and depression. And is super lonely.
So both are clueless and it’s not really a case study without more data. Both are poorly functioning adults. And shouldn’t blame it on the child. (Wifey also states he was previously divorced, so one strike for having bad wife game. He’s clueless about the female stages of manipulation to provide for her and her child. She’s running roughshod over him. And he’s rolling over and being passive.)
Thanks for letting me through moderation Archie.
I love your frame. And I’ve read your stuff. And I think you are right on target with your observations.
“What should homie do? What does the current Red Pill say?
Mouthbreather – “Hold Frame”
Mouthbreather – “Use dread”
Mouthbreather – “Constantly improve yourself”
Mouthbreather – “Introduce competition anxiety!””
Neither, either, all. The question is flawed. A Homie is your buddy that has a clue. He has none. And she is all over him. He has no clue. He has not discovered having other buddies to give him clue. He’s drifting. Not purposeful. Not in a direct line. Sloshing around in a sea of emotions she has with her.
He is not actually a Homie. Don’t call him such.
It’s disgusting. A puke fest. She’s just puking her insecurities and her anxiety and her depression. Living for the two-year-old-boy with no direction, no purpose and losing her fucking shit. And he can’t guide her. Because. Disgusting.
The better question is why do these people live? What do they live for? What is their purpose, their mission?
They have no fucking idea. They are adrift in her sea of anxiety and depressed emotions. Neither have any clue to buy. Which is what you know Archie. (Oh, and one of my wife’s cats is named Archie, Btw…)
PalmaSailor has the right tack. Which is Leading. And Goes into the next essay. Domination. Not Simping. And as I have said, the original premise has it all wrong. There is nothing wrong with any relationship choice that a man wants to chose. Because he has choice. And is directed. And leads. That is what the essence of the masculine is: Strength, Courage, Mastery and Honor among men. The OP has none of that.
Back in 2012, Nick Krauser, who is pretty insular, had it right about taking charge in short, intermediate and long term relationships. It’s about quality. Not quantity. Not that there is anything wrong about quantity for a man…
https://krauserpua.com/2012/09/12/deep-conversion/
The thing is: It doesn’t happen after marriage. It happens in real time, along the way all the time, one step at a time, stepping over hurdles, with success, one frame at a time. Any man that plans his future ahead of his skills is a fucking fool. You take it as it goes. And you redirect as bad shit happens.
Avoiding the female stages of manipulation, but realizing her manipulations can be good or bad relative to whether they are serving the interests of the married man or not. If they are good, they are good. If they are bad, they are.
But that doesn’t negate his burden of performance to drive her to good. She is out for her and her children. He should respect that but not let her run over him.
She will test him.
She will ask him to communicate. (Show me your poker cards buddy so I know your plan. If he has no plan for her and her kids, guess what? He’s a loser…)
She will put him to work. Do this mindless chore form me.. (If he allows it. Because she wants to show force.)
If he falls down on the Job? She will practice evolutionary selfishness.
And Then, she will practice Self-Determination. Which is what stage the original post is binging on. She is not happy and one stage away from thinking she can determine her own self. But she is flailing. It’s a thought she has. But is only her emotions at the lowest fucking point in her life.
She and him need to wake up. And Be Woke Up.
And there are plenty, plenty of Red Pill Married resources for that.
This explains the fuck all about the process which happens in every long term relationship (esp. with children…) ever:
https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/4hpmg2/theory_the_betaization_process_stages_of_female/
It is attempted with impunity (exemption from punishment or freedom from the injurious consequences of an action…) in every fucking relationship.
And it should be resisted with awareness. And done to further the interests of the man, and reinforce and help her goal to to protect her interests and the interests of the children. And there is nothing inherently bad about the whole deal, when all interests are helped with the skill of the man.
In the end, it is Pimp Game. And it is a farce to think it is a Zero Sum Game.
There’s no way to be successful in life without the Red Pill. And there’s no quick fix to the Red Pill. But there are some emergency measures that can be taken.
Change your habits. Hit the gym. If you’ve been sloppy with dress/hygiene, change that.
Change your mind. If you’re used to thinking that flirting with women is wrong because marriage, get over that. Did your vows include a promise to not flirt with women? B-b-b-but it might lead to something. Do you lack self control or something? gtfooh
Men need self-control. Self-control is the beginning of power. Flirt with women.
Men need strength. Strength is good for health and for reproduction. Hit the gym.
Men need strength of mind. Work on your critical thinking skills.