The practical value of watching this show is that you have conversation fodder for dealing with black women and chicks that follow urban culture.
The simple story is that a twenty something fabulous black couple has been dating for a while. The boyfriend is not working a 9-5 job, but is instead working on an app. She comes home and he’s playing video games on her birthday which he forgot. The girlfriend is getting restless and she is mulling over cheating. He gets his act together (works a job @ Best Buy and then gets a job at a start up).
And after he gets his act together she finds herself hanging out with a guy from her past and ends up cheating on him. Boyfriend finds out, leaves girlfriend. In what we think is going to be a reconciliation between the two – 
The girlfriend comes back to their apartment to find all his stuff cleaned out except the Best Buy polo.
The next shot is of the former boyfriend smanging the hell out of a cute cashier that did recognize his worth.
So the girl argument from season 1 is that it was okay understandable for the Girlfriend to cheat because the Boyfriend wasn’t taking care of the homefront. Keep in mind, he was paying the bills, he had his own car, and he was working on his business. The fact that the business wasn’t going anywhere – made him understandably depressed. We don’t know what was going on with the App and we don’t know how Issa tried to nag encourage him to get on his hustle. The women that watch this show were also mad that the Boyfriend did get with the girl who was giving him some attention. They were especially mad at the fact that boyfriend was HITTING IT EXTRA HARD LIKE A MAN POSSESSED.
The guy argument – open and shut case. Missing a b-day is okay, and the chick over-reacted to one particular incident. He more than made up for it by getting a job, getting a better job, and then taking the girl ring shopping. The girlfriend betrayed him after he had done everything to make her happy.
That’s the plot of season 1. Season 2 just started, and we’re seeing the fall out.
This is great conversation if you’re dealing with black women 21-35.
But I don’t bring this to you guys because you need more pop culture openers. I bring it to you because of one of the keys in Girlfriend’s malaise is an important thing to notice about chicks in general.
The traditional analysis from chicks is that after 3-4 years the Boyfriend needed to
- Get his Financial Act Together
- Propose Marriage
Issa stepping out on him is not surprising.
The Manosphere analysis would probably be something along the lines of
- He needed to be “more Alpha” and keep his girl in check.
- He needed to Instill Dread, so she would not want to leave his side
The player analysis is this.
- His mood affected her mood. And if he’s on a downswing, that pulls her down.
- Hardcore, wall climbing, leg shaking #$%ing is an essential part of keeping the chick emotionally satisfied.
#2 is obvious. No matter how you feel about a chick in a long term relationship, you’re obligated to put it down. If you don’t have a job – you still have a job to do.
But #1 is the key insight. When you’re down – she’s down. When you’re up, she’s up. When you’re happy – she’s happy. But you can’t make her happy by doing things for her.
Here’s Patrice on the subject
So that’s one of the keys. But let’s dig a bit deeper.
Why does she become unhappy and restless when you are unhappy and restless?
Because she often pings off of others to PUMP HER OWN EMOTIONAL STATE.
When you see a 1 group of girls meet up with other girlfriends – they SQUEE – and that gets them hype. I see it all the time at the club.
At work – chicks are constantly playing good music, podcasts, changing their hair, looking in the mirror, eating – all sorts of stuff to keep their state pumped.
We see that when we go out. We notice that in chicks that we deal with.
In the long term situation – we often forget that. And that was Lawrence’s crime. He didn’t monitor his own emotional state in order to keep this chick inline.
So in the LTR situation – that’s part of what you need to do – if you’ve decided to take the preventative route to keeping your relationship going. (Playing defense).
In a pull situation – your energy needs to be higher at the beginning, and then go to an “end game” vibe at the end. Because she pings off of you to know how to feel.
-Archie
Nice.
This show is endless fodder for the opinion routine.
Never looked at it from this angle though.
When Issa stepped out it was in to the vibe she wasn’t getting. Low key, fun pumping her state and letting the crazy rap side (her true inner self in the show) come out.
Next thing she knows she trips and falls on some D.
I use the emotional state thing all the time. Especially with groups.
Been playing more with taking it to extremes and using her friends to pump her state for me.
The other day I had a group of girls yelling at their friend “you are the boss bitch” in the club which was hilarious but also effective.
Do you think mod holds retard the conversation flow?
That’s a question of site direction. I may turn on the option to let those who have been pre-approved to post willy nilly. I get a fair amount of spam as it is
Hey Archie,
I completely agree with your premise – even though I’ve never seen the show – that it is of the utmost importance to monitor one’s emotional state if a relaionship is to be maintained with a woman.
For this reason, I do my best to constantly be in tune with how any women around me are feeling. How do I do this? Mainly body language, and listening to her voice and it’s qualities.
So far it seems to mostly work out for me. As a player who is still in the beginning stages of the game (I’m only 26, notch count 30 (for scientific puposes only)), there is still much to learn. At times I lose control and the shit tests start happening. My girls at the moment are smart and they both have Ivy League degrees. I’m a college dropout who just moved back in with his parents and is working on an app, and generally getting my life in order.
I’m only able to keep 2 “independent women”, who both make at least twice my yearly take home income, in check (for now anyways), by using game and trying to remain psychologically and emotionally dominant at all times. Sometimes I slip up, and when they smell blood they pounce, but they are most happy when I past their tests, and provide them with the feels and all of the other intangibles they need, as well as the good D.
Where the character in this show fails is not being emotionally present, and not being aware of his woman’s hypergamous instinct. As men I think it is a very important skill to have. Knowing about their emotions, their body language, and their penchant for hypergamy, will help you to maintain good relationships. I’m still working on this, but the more I get a grasp of this stuff, the more my relationship quality improves.
They really don’t care about how we feel. They only care about how we make them feel. And he wasn’t doing his job, or providing her with enough of the right feels to keep her hypergamous instincts at bay.
I keep my game tight by compartmentalism. I don’t bring my women home, instead I go to theirs. I don’t tell them about my job, the things that make me sad, or any other things about me that will present me in a low value light. I try to create mystery and intrigue. I try to tell them as little as I can. I try to make it all about them and less about me. I try to get into their heads and get them to form deep emotional bonds with me like they’ve never felt before. I try to lead them at all times when I can, and make them follow me. I try to bring them to orgasm when I can so it can releases oxytocin in their brains and deepens their bond with me.
I try to exercise my mind and body and stay sharp with boxing and running, which in turn keeps my testosterone levels high, and keeps me in a better emotional state, because, like you said, they feel what we feel, so in spite of my life not being where I want, the exercise helps me feel good, which in turn makes them feel good. Also being in shape makes for better sex too. All the while on the back end I am getting my life together and putting the pieces together brick by brick.
Homie in the show has made many mistakes. At the same time, I’m not mad at the girl. Maybe a year ago I would’ve been, but in the words of my man Dante Nero aka Beige Phillip, “you can’t be mad at fish for swimming.” He made way too many mistakes and she was just acting according to her instincts. He was slacking on his macking.
This show sounds interesting and in some ways parallels with my life. I might check it out. At the moment I am watching house of cards, which features great displays of Machiavellianism at work, and I’d recommend it to anyone for game/entertainment.
How would Lawrence have prevented Issa from creeping?
I don’t want to get my pressure up but two things emerged from the show.
1) He needed to do well at his job, be positive, and push the relationship forward to keep her occupied. Even though she cheated – according to the female writers and the female audience – it was his role to keep her engaged.
And this was not “hypergamy”. Daniel, the rap producer, was not really a “bigger and better” deal. He was not more physically attractive, nor was he in a better financial position.
That brings us to #2
2) This was about me, not about you – Issa says to Lawrence
So in the show, episode 2-3 – she ghosts on Lawrence. They live together and she decides not to go home.
I don’t know how many of you guys have ever lived through that – but that’s insanely cruel in a committed relationship.
Lawrence steps his game up. Gets off his ass, gets a job @ Best Buy, then levels up and gets a job at a start up. He takes her ring shopping at some point.
AFTER he gets his act together, doing what she wants, SHE STILL CHEATS ON HIM.
Her in the moment comment, was that her getting with this long time “what if” guy – was about her.
And it was.
That could have happened at any point, no matter the boyfriend’s behavior.
So a player/realists, the way we come at the whole idea of a monogamous long term relationship – is that we can’t do anything to stop a chick that wants to fuck someone else. Only she can.
That means one of the last levels of this game thing is let go of the idea that you’re responsible for her actions.