The Scenario
You’re dating a chick, and you find out something you don’t want to find out. From there you start making your moves. The square tries to salvage the relationship, the player tries to get out as soon as possible.
At least that’s what the manual says. What often happens is that a young player, or an old one like myself, finally meets a chick that is worth investing in. And if you’re not out there gathering up new prospects, your game gets a little dated, a little rusty. This is much to the benefit of the your main chick…at first.
However, the tests keep coming at you. And since you don’t have any internal leverage – you’re running out of moves.
And then she breaks up with you.
What happens next?
Q. How can you have game and still get burned?
A. You can have great short game and horrible long game.
I’ve learned that lesson repeatedly. Every horrible breakup I’ve ever had, I’ve had a chick in the sack within a week. Often it’s my exes friends. (Don’t let that cat out of the bag though)
So what do you young players (and old ones) need to learn?
- Should you always avoid relationships?
- Should you be the old man at the club surrounded by girls who keep up with all the new dances?
- Should you just go your own way when your time is up?
- Resign yourself to the idea that you had a good run?
- Move to Barranquilla Colombia to find your unicorn?
Most players in this dilemma do one of two things.
- They never commit the same way a woman commits. As Patrice O’Neal (the Patron Saint of WIA) would say, “You can’t love a woman the same way she loves you”
- Keep your game sharp by staying in the mix.
We’ll explore the first option in other posts, but for guys that are currently in bad situations, this is what I have to say.
You might be raising a few young’ns in the suburbs. Probably pushing an SUV with a 3rd row that gets use. It is what it is. But you don’t have to die.
You have to do two things.
First, you need to keep your social skills sharp. It’s a horrible fact that MOST men stop having new friends after they leave college. The key word there is MOST. You need to cultivate new friendships by breaking bread with your co-workers, connecting with the fathers and husbands in your local area. Learning new skills by taking classes (at community college with off duty strippers!).
Second, keep your external game sharp. This is the generic GQ advice, but eating right, exercise, keeping your style game together. By themselves the externals don’t give you game. But when you have all of that together, you’re still catching glances from chicks. Not saying you need to act on those glances, but you need to keep a positive self image in your mind. And using external game and external validation to help you do that, is a net positive. You can’t base your identity on the externals, but like a pre-work out supplement – it helps.
-Archie