How to Talk to Cashiers

This scenario came up over at Rollo’s.  I was writing something longer, but I’m figuring out it’s better to just put something out rather than fiddle with it.

The original scenario is a guy in a long line at the grocery store.  One of the cashiers seems to give him some “rhythm”, and he wanted to know what to do with it.,,,,

If you’re in the line at the grocery store and notice a cute cashier giving you the eye, which makes you want to run some game.

 You’re too damn thirsty

(unless you’re in high school and this girl is also in high school, elsewise you’re too damn thirsty…)

But If you do happen to notice that girls are giving you signals,

You’ve got a good eye

In order to make this happen, you have to understand the social constraints, the social dynamics of the work situation.

Let’s think about other common situations and think those through.

• If you were at a bar at night, and she was a shot girl.
• If you were at a strip club, and she was a dancer
• If you were visiting a client and notice one of the admins

All of these require understanding the culture and the social aspects.  A girl working during the night life is very used to getting hit on.  So she has a lot of resistance to “real connection”.

Furthermore, hospitality industry girls typically go out with people in their own industry.  (Known Quantities, Vetted Guys, Closed Social Circle).   Them Vegas boys living the dream don’t smash chicks coming in from Sheboygan.  They leave their engineering jobs during the day to be bar backs so that they can be PEERS with strippers and hot cocktail waitresses.

When “industry girls” don’t do that, they meet guys in civilian clothes.  Guys they meet at work? That’s money. They see the guy not as a beta provider (best case scenario) just more tips for the night. (A sucker)

Need more evidence? Date some strippers.  They often end up “exploring” their sexuality or getting with guys that shock their conscience after dealing with so many guys just handing over cold hard cash for next to nothing.

Now a cute cashier isn’t a battle scarred stripper.  So if a cute cashier makes it known that she’s checking for you.  Keep some things in mind.

She’s breaking feminine protocol by letting you notice her.

Typically, Girls only let themselves be seen checking you out if you’re sufficiently attractive enough to warrant her miniscule loss of social status.  (or she’s drunk and the real Gal Gadot comes out.) A girl that pursues is generally “low status” – take note of the quotes, meant to suggest that status is relative, not absolute.  And not low status to men, but low status to who really counts – other women.  The most cutting things girls say to each other about being sluts.   Indeed, what her friends think of her, are often more important to her than what her family thinks, what society thinks, what *she* thinks of herself.  That’s one of the reasons why most pimps have a stab…..(nope, don’t know anything about that.  Go read some literature on the subject)

But even if she breaks “girl code”

She’s not breaking her work role just yet.

If any of you have ever managed young ladies, if she’s particularly attractive, don’t be surprised if she’s unreliable.   And put those chicks on the floor, a lot of them aren’t particularly into the bs jobs they work. (Same bs jobs the guys work..)

Just cause the chick is eternally bored, doesn’t mean she’s going to hop all over you.  And the fact that she has “work”, means that she can use a convenient reason to shut you down.

If you were really and truly hot (OMG I want his babies right now), she’d stop what she was doing to get your attention.

When a chick is truly on the hook, she moves stuff out of the way. 

Guys seem to get that after the bang or when the chick knows that other chicks are trying to get at him, but it’s rare that an avg guy -the 99% of us who aren’t Brad Bieber Clooney – gets that.

In this case, what you got is a signal.  As usual, a girl will give you a “green light” signal when she actually has *all* the leverage in the situation.  She can shut things down whenever she wants to.

From the outset, and even with top game advice, this is a low probability pull because you don’t have the time and she’s not in the mindset.

For example, A chick with a boyfriend can give you all sorts of signals. Boyfriend could be standing right there, fuming, trying to contain himself.

Well of course she can flirt and get you riled up and him riled up – because some chicks like to toy with guys. For her there’s no downside, because a normal guy would respect the other guy’s ownership.  Chicks love that sort of dynamic.

Rules bind you, but not her.

In this work situation, the social rules allow you to talk to her, but you can’t go hard because

• She’s busy
• The other customers
• Her boss, and
• General “I don’t want to look like the slut that I truly am”

If you say the wrong thing, at worst security will be summoned, at best, you have to avoid her line next time you show up.

So there are a lot of plays here, but for the most part – you don’t have a lot of LEVERAGE over her.  And game is about LEVERAGE.

If you’re a pretty boy, tall, muscles, well dressed – you’re probably the 5th guy today that’s been in her line that has all of that.  You can do some butter knife stuff like ask for her #, and you might or might not get it.

It’s 50/50.

She can only say YES, or something other than YES (anything other than yes = no).  And even in that situation, if the chick is young and hot enough – getting her attention in the smartphone/tinder/instagram/social media age will be nigh impossible.

So how do you make her want you to ask for her #, or better yet volunteer her #?  How do you flip the situation from her being the buyer to her being the seller?

For a low low price of 19.99….lol

Let’s think about this scenario given what we already know about the game.

If you had 15 minutes to 3 hours to days to work on the chick – then you run the typical indirect game where you engage her, get her talking, and then withhold your validation of her until she proves herself. (Mystery Method in an efficient nutshell)

But you don’t have that sort of time.  You have to make a strong impression is how the new player thinks.  The veteran thinks differently.

Now a lot of average guys want to hit chicks with something clever or funny.  If you were Dave Chapelle, maybe you could elicit a belly laugh.  However there’s no leverage there either. (Very few comedians have smoking hot wives. Despite having fame, money, and “being a guy with a good sense of humor” FYI)

What would make her want to hang out based on a 4-5 minute interaction?

That’s the question.

A solution that I mentioned on the blog was to

• Grab a box of wine/6 pack
• Banter with the people in the line
• When you get to her, bring her into the discussion (and break her out of straight cashier mode)
• Logistics (When’s your shift over, etc)
• Qualify her (Are you spontaneous?)
• Ask the buying question (I’m having a party, it’s gonna be so dope,

And then you can ask her if she doesn’t volunteer.

That was the blog comment solution.

The things to understand here is not the “solution”, but the thought process.  It requires having empathy with the girl

(WTF? WIA is going soft?!! Fuck that dude – Red Ink for Red Pill.)

I know, I know.  A huge part of why dudes fuck up in the game is too much empathy.  I’m asking you to put yourself in her shoes to understand where she is emotionally.  Bored, Tired, Maybe her Feet Hurt.  If she’s young, chances are she’s always looking for something more engaging. At the same time, she has these various norms to work against.  So use that to your advantage.

-Archie