Game vs Pick Up part 487

First off, the dude in me gotta chuckle at “My Truth”.

The video is cued up to 1:00 (You don’t really need to watch the rest, it’s the standard, I dated a guy that was cool with stripping and then not cool with it.)

Before I moved into this apartment, I was talking to a guy for a really long time. And I was thinking, “Oh, when I move into my apartment, I’m not gonna be alone.  He’s gonna sleep over all the time. And it’s gonna be like we live together.

That’s was a big motivation for me to move. Cause I wanted our own space.

A place to decorate

My friends will come visit me

Girl, you alone.  I need to hurry up and get like 10 cats…

The way this plays out, she signs a lease, waits for the place to get built, and her and the guy stop talking.  Now she’s stuck with this lease in a place by herself.

Now her advice to the mostly female audience is to never make a big move “for a guy”.

Red Pill Thinking Caps on – This is the hamster at work.  She made this move for herself, hoping that this guy would give her the emotional intimacy that she craves.

The Red Pill is just gonna have a dude laughing at this “dumb chick” for making a mistake like this.

But the player, the guy with game, what does he see in this?

I’m not gonna be alone.  All the dimes I’ve ever dated, not so much the 5’s and 6’s that I’ve run through – this fear of being alone is common.

Back in the olden times of pick up, there was thing called “elicitation of values”  This was during the Neurolingustic Programming/Speed Seduction days.

There were a couple ways to play this.

Being able to get a girl to divulge this sort of stuff is very attractive in a man.

The act of her actually divulging these things builds comfort, builds emotional connection.

But the “Game” lite aspect of PUA was she tells you how she feels – and then you use that information to emulate/reject these things.

So if the girl says she likes dogs because of their loyalty, you play up your loyalty later in the interaction. (not right then, because it’s transparent)

I don’t recall “emulation” being very successful, but I could be wrong.

There was one thing that almost always worked.  If she said she only dated jerks and assholes, that’s a clear sign that her hamster likes jerks and assholes, and the more you fit into her version of that, the more attracted she becomes.

But what if you went from 1% game PUA to the 2% method that I push?

The real difference between PUA/Red Pill and other methods, is that Game is about

• Getting into the person’s mind
• Getting into lots of people’s mind
• Uncovering their desires
• Giving them away to get those things that they say they want
• The things that people usually want but won’t say

That’s why Game is what you see with a lot of these prosperity gospel preachers, politicians, etc. They really empathize with their audience, bring up things that they want, and things that they want but won’t say, and in often bring up things that they didn’t realize they wanted.

That’s why the overlap between Game and Pick Up is fairly small.

A lot of girls are like our Youtube friend above.  There’s a deep need to be around someone, to have someone around.  Fulfilling that and also remembering when to take it away is a key tool in making those deeper connections.

So if you’re doing the short game, just a simple pick up/SDL/SNL – how would you sprinkle in some Game?

Let’s think about the sequence and where you might find out about this and where you might use that information to “grow closer”.

1. Baseline – You’re on your path and purpose, mind right, money straight, working out, eating right, sleeping, meditating
2. Logistics on lock before you leave the house
3. Seen the girl.
4. Made your Assessment.
5. You’ve gotten her attention, started the chat, and the chat is now mutual.
6. The back and forth is done.  The banter is over with.
7. You’ve dealt with her friend group and any sort of logistical issues.
8. She’s decided she likes you.
9. You’ve qualified.  You’ve gotten cooperation. You’ve lead.
10. You’ve broken the touch barrier. You’ve verbally escalated. You’ve moved her around.

The Trust Building Phase – Now you start with your comfort/rapport/getting to really know her phase.  This is where probing for the loneliness insecurity is useful.

Some caveats to Going Deep

A lot of Nice Guys that aren’t running game get trapped here in the trust building phase.  Girl uses them as a therapist/emotional tampon, forms a strong bond as a friend/good listener, but can’t see them sexually SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE YOU KNOW HER DIRT.

So getting her to surrender herself to a possible sexual partner is walking a tight rope.  You don’t want a truly unedited chick, because then you’re her girlfriend.

You guys reading this have already gotten attraction first, so you aren’t in danger of the friend zone.  Some guys go for comfort first, but this requires a level of skill, nonverbal cue reading, and social intelligence, that I find it hard myself to do it.

How to get the information

In terms of getting intel, ideally (and often what happens) the chick will give you all sorts of info on her inner psyche UNPROMPTED.

But if you need to prompt this

Ask questions

Make statements

Tell stories

Divulge things that would be sensitive to other people but not sensitive to the player.

These are often what signals the girl for her to tell you her stuff.  You are leading her.

A note on leading. 

In particular with younger girls, more insecure girls – when a chick is digging you and doesn’t really have a good sense of her own emotional boundaries – she’ll tell you what she thinks you want to hear, just for you to stay next to her.  See Above.

This girl, as lovely as she is, as many potential partners as she has, as lonely as she is – she was willing to make this major life change on the HOPE that some random dude she was seeing would spend more time with her.  I know a lot of you just want to grab a piece of that fake ass and bring those silicone titties to your chest and just hug her to make her feel safe.  Admit it!

I know that’s what some guys look for, but when you get further down the road, you’ll see these types of “I put my man above myself” can be problematic.  She wants to be around you all the time, super submissive, always doing stuff – but she’s making a “covert contract”.  She’s giving you stuff in the hopes that you give her stuff.  She’s basically doing the girl version of being a “nice guy”.  You get all this “free benefit”, but what she wants is more and more of your time (and money and effort as the time goes on).

Dateless guys jump for this, but a man that’s on his purpose?  He needs his own time.  It’s harmful to him and any sort of relationship if he has to “receive” all of this love she’s showing him.

Once the information is received, now what?

Anytime I hear something deep like that, I “break the spell”.

Cause when you’re in the trust building mode and the girl is just flowing, you need to break rapport and then come back to it. (Maybe this is fractionation?)

I like to stop the flow, look into her eyes, and then acknowledge that she said something to me that was beyond the normal.  (even if she thinks this is normal, because so many chicks will tell you some traumatic shit that they don’t recognize as traumatic.).

Then I pull her in, physically, and I want her to keep talking.

If you are an FDS fan, perhaps this is cynical and calculating, but I do really want her to feel the warmth of my body, my touch, smell the Tobacco Vanille and talk to me openly, without needing to look into my eyes.

From there, you go back to the sequence and make things light.  But if she shares a “moment” (or in my case, creating a moment out of thin air), how good is that later on connection going to be?

You think I get flaked on regularly?

-Archie