Is because guys
1) must have control, over everything
2) don’t know any thing other than withdraw attention from her, and put the attention on themselves (self improvement) or other girls (dread or competition anxiety)
With this mentality the better strategy ends up being to never get involved on an emotional level, so that one can actually pull up stakes on a whim. The always have a suitcase packed idea. You can’t ever become emotionally involved – a man’s experience with love gets replaced with cold rationality.
But like at the end of the movie Heat, where Deniro has been preaching to drop everything if you need to escape but can’t live up to his own aside.
https://youtu.be/iNyAgN48FQo
The problem is the mindset. Withdrawing one’s attention seems like the only option because very little time has ever been spent on learning the true power of the reframe.
Patrice O’Neal, patron saint of truly old school game doesn’t use the term reframe. He says that he gives a girl options on how to think.
When the customer is focused on price, the salesman who previously qualified her in disposable income, shifts the conversation to convenience, style, things that are less concrete than price.
In XXL’s thread on how to react to a woman acting up, Mufasa had a great gambit
You’re trying to end this relationship over that?
He reframes her behavior as an attempt to end the relationship. That is basically a sea shift, a ground change.
It needn’t be that extreme or harsh. The way a girl trains a guy is to basically do the same thing, when he does something and she says to him, “this is what you think of me?”
The power of that sort of reframe is that it forces the guy to defend himself in the present, but she’s trying to get him to conform his behavior in the future. To think of her first whenever HE does anything.
It’s not a 100% strategy, because unless you warp her mind or vice versa, she still has agency. But it goes a long way to modify her behavior.
So in the situation of a long term relationship, the reason that good players
1) make her invest
2) put a price on themselves
3) have a hot and cold nature
4) stay social, keep building themselves
Is to mold the chick, cultivate her mind.
To give her new ways of thinking.