Incorporating Dark Triad Into Your Game

bill-cosby

What can I say about Dark Triad that hasn’t been extensively written about by guys who’ve spent far more time on it than I have.

Google says the best person on it is this guy.   I know the concept from Red Pill Forums and their 2 of the big R’s.

We were talking a bit about on McQueen’s forum today, so that’s what got me to think thinking about it today.

For those unfamiliar, Dark Triad Game is using the 3 “bad” psychological traits to your romantic advantage.

  • Narcissism – Ultraconfidence without justification
  • Machiavellian Behavior – Seeing people and situations as a chess board, and manipulating them for your own gains
  • Psychopathy – Lack of empathy, lack of remorse, lack of fear.

Together the 3 combine like Voltron and make you a master player.  Or so it’s thought.

I don’t think trying to emulate a Dark Triad guy is the way to go about it – but I cannot deny that going this route gets you girls.   I actually think it’s worse than paying for it = but that’s my moral judgment.  You’re allowed to think and pursue whatever you want.  It’s your life.

And for the thinking player, you can read those traits and see how they fit into the game perfectly.

The downsides to Dark Triad Game

  • Narcissism – Very fragile when it comes to criticism
  • Machiavellian Behavior – You don’t connect with people on a truly emotional level
  • Psychopathy – Not feeling empathy for the girls you go attempt to go out with, or go out with – can land you in a heap of trouble

That’s how it’s framed in contemporary pick up lit.  How do I see it though?

Like anything else discussed online, I see it as a tool.

  • Confidence without justification is the essence of fake it till you make it.
  • Seeing people as parts in some great machine is not dehumanizing, but rather it considers human society as an organism unto itself.
  • Both the lack of fear and lack of empathy are core.  Lack of fear, means that you approach.
  • Lack of empathy is trickier – but the key here is to recognize that guys play out a losing scenario in their minds before they even talk to a girl.
    • It is their empathy, putting themselves in the shoes of strangers, and assuming that if the man steps up, she’s going to be hurt and bothered.

So overall I don’t really have problems with bringing these ideas into the style of game that I suggest.  Though I hate economic and war metaphors, in this case, the market rewards a guy that understands what these things are. The man that is confident, that understands what motivates people, and also gets over “leadership discomfort” – ends up running things.

-Archie

How to Talk to Cashiers

This scenario came up over at Rollo’s.  I was writing something longer, but I’m figuring out it’s better to just put something out rather than fiddle with it.

The original scenario is a guy in a long line at the grocery store.  One of the cashiers seems to give him some “rhythm”, and he wanted to know what to do with it.,,,,

If you’re in the line at the grocery store and notice a cute cashier giving you the eye, which makes you want to run some game.

 You’re too damn thirsty

(unless you’re in high school and this girl is also in high school, elsewise you’re too damn thirsty…)

But If you do happen to notice that girls are giving you signals,

You’ve got a good eye

In order to make this happen, you have to understand the social constraints, the social dynamics of the work situation.

Let’s think about other common situations and think those through.

  • If you were at a bar at night, and she was a shot girl.
  • If you were at a strip club, and she was a dancer
  • If you were visiting a client and notice one of the admins

All of these require understanding the culture and the social aspects.  A girl working during the night life is very used to getting hit on.  So she has a lot of resistance to “real connection”.

Furthermore, hospitality industry girls typically go out with people in their own industry.  (Known Quantities, Vetted Guys, Closed Social Circle).   Them Vegas boys living the dream don’t smash chicks coming in from Sheboygan.  They leave their engineering jobs during the day to be bar backs so that they can be PEERS with strippers and hot cocktail waitresses.

When “industry girls” don’t do that, they meet guys in civilian clothes.  Guys they meet at work? That’s money. They see the guy not as a beta provider (best case scenario) just more tips for the night. (A sucker)

Need more evidence? Date some strippers.  They often end up “exploring” their sexuality or getting with guys that shock their conscience after dealing with so many guys just handing over cold hard cash for next to nothing.

Now a cute cashier isn’t a battle scarred stripper.  So if a cute cashier makes it known that she’s checking for you.  Keep some things in mind.

She’s breaking feminine protocol by letting you notice her.

Typically, Girls only let themselves be seen checking you out if you’re sufficiently attractive enough to warrant her miniscule loss of social status.  (or she’s drunk and the real Gal Gadot comes out.) A girl that pursues is generally “low status” – take note of the quotes, meant to suggest that status is relative, not absolute.  And not low status to men, but low status to who really counts – other women.  The most cutting things girls say to each other about being sluts.   Indeed, what her friends think of her, are often more important to her than what her family thinks, what society thinks, what *she* thinks of herself.  That’s one of the reasons why most pimps have a stab…..(nope, don’t know anything about that.  Go read some literature on the subject)

But even if she breaks “girl code”

She’s not breaking her work role just yet.

If any of you have ever managed young ladies, if she’s particularly attractive, don’t be surprised if she’s unreliable.   And put those chicks on the floor, a lot of them aren’t particularly into the bs jobs they work. (Same bs jobs the guys work..)

Just cause the chick is eternally bored, doesn’t mean she’s going to hop all over you.  And the fact that she has “work”, means that she can use a convenient reason to shut you down.

If you were really and truly hot (OMG I want his babies right now), she’d stop what she was doing to get your attention.

When a chick is truly on the hook, she moves stuff out of the way. 

Guys seem to get that after the bang or when the chick knows that other chicks are trying to get at him, but it’s rare that an avg guy -the 99% of us who aren’t Brad Bieber Clooney – gets that.

In this case, what you got is a signal.  As usual, a girl will give you a “green light” signal when she actually has *all* the leverage in the situation.  She can shut things down whenever she wants to.

From the outset, and even with top game advice, this is a low probability pull because you don’t have the time and she’s not in the mindset.

For example, A chick with a boyfriend can give you all sorts of signals. Boyfriend could be standing right there, fuming, trying to contain himself.

Well of course she can flirt and get you riled up and him riled up – because some chicks like to toy with guys. For her there’s no downside, because a normal guy would respect the other guy’s ownership.  Chicks love that sort of dynamic.

Rules bind you, but not her.

In this work situation, the social rules allow you to talk to her, but you can’t go hard because

  • She’s busy
  • The other customers
  • Her boss, and
  • General “I don’t want to look like the slut that I truly am”

If you say the wrong thing, at worst security will be summoned, at best, you have to avoid her line next time you show up.

So there are a lot of plays here, but for the most part – you don’t have a lot of LEVERAGE over her.  And game is about LEVERAGE.

If you’re a pretty boy, tall, muscles, well dressed – you’re probably the 5th guy today that’s been in her line that has all of that.  You can do some butter knife stuff like ask for her #, and you might or might not get it.

It’s 50/50.

She can only say YES, or something other than YES (anything other than yes = no).  And even in that situation, if the chick is young and hot enough – getting her attention in the smartphone/tinder/instagram/social media age will be nigh impossible.

So how do you make her want you to ask for her #, or better yet volunteer her #?  How do you flip the situation from her being the buyer to her being the seller?

For a low low price of 19.99….lol

Let’s think about this scenario given what we already know about the game.

If you had 15 minutes to 3 hours to days to work on the chick – then you run the typical indirect game where you engage her, get her talking, and then withhold your validation of her until she proves herself. (Mystery Method in an efficient nutshell)

But you don’t have that sort of time.  You have to make a strong impression is how the new player thinks.  The veteran thinks differently.

Now a lot of average guys want to hit chicks with something clever or funny.  If you were Dave Chapelle, maybe you could elicit a belly laugh.  However there’s no leverage there either. (Very few comedians have smoking hot wives. Despite having fame, money, and “being a guy with a good sense of humor” FYI)

What would make her want to hang out based on a 4-5 minute interaction?

That’s the question.

A solution that I mentioned on the blog was to

  • Grab a box of wine/6 pack
  • Banter with the people in the line
  • When you get to her, bring her into the discussion (and break her out of straight cashier mode)
  • Logistics (When’s your shift over, etc)
  • Qualify her (Are you spontaneous?)
  • Ask the buying question (I’m having a party, it’s gonna be so dope,

And then you can ask her if she doesn’t volunteer.

That was the blog comment solution.

The things to understand here is not the “solution”, but the thought process.  It requires having empathy with the girl

(WTF? WIA is going soft?!! Fuck that dude – Red Ink for Red Pill.)

I know, I know.  A huge part of why dudes fuck up in the game is too much empathy.  I’m asking you to put yourself in her shoes to understand where she is emotionally.  Bored, Tired, Maybe her Feet Hurt.  If she’s young, chances are she’s always looking for something more engaging. At the same time, she has these various norms to work against.  So use that to your advantage.

-Archie

Errant Thoughts

The beginning of the series Fargo, Watson is sitting down to eat tomato soup and a burnt grilled cheese with his wife.  She’s gossiping about what other people have, in particular, that his younger brother has a new surround sound system.  And then she chirps that maybe she married the wrong brother.  Watson demurs. As a man, I find this scene a tad painful.

But this “beat”, this well worn groove of culture, sets the tone of the relationship.  Because as American consumers of American media, we all have seen this character before in media, but the wife is also someone we know.

Not to get too Rollo, but let’s delve into her mindset a bit.  It’s not that she doesn’t have all the comforts that most enjoy, it’s that her workhorse hasn’t beaten all the other workhorses.  And now that she’s fat and old, she’s trying to needle her man into getting her more – so that she can compete with the other broads.

She’s not looking for some objective level of material wealth, but a relative level – where she needs to be on top of all of her female friends.

Though the story may fiction, fiction must follow some level of reality in order for the unreal to be believed.

The woman is real.

This is real feminine behavior.  This is common.

For you guys that avoid meeting a girl’s friends, co-workers, and family – she’s bringing you around because she’s proud of you, and wants to show you off. She’s not going to say it outright,

#2 – Pence, Trump, Comey, Maxine Waters

This is a very political blog, it’s just that my politics don’t really fit into what other people think of as politics.  You’re not really gonna Make America like Malcolm X Wants it To Be here.

But politics is how we divvy up scarce goods without resorting to physical violence.  Politics is war by another name.  War is politics by another name.

The game is politics played at the micro level – we are giving a woman what she wants at a mental/emotional level, even if we don’t necessarily give her what she wants at tangible material level.   And the game principles behind that are simply

  • She doesn’t want those things
  • When she get those things she’s not happy
  • You giving her those things actually makes her lose interest in you
  • People prefer the anticipation/the journey more than the reward

So in the news this week, Comey (former director of the FBI) tells Congress that he didn’t really want to be in the same room as Trump.   So Maxine Waters uses this as an opportunity to chime in that Comey feels like many women feel.

Okay, hand clap to you Ms. Waters. (Who I am generally a fan of.  Let’s not get it twisted)

But hold up a sec (c) Bushwick Bill

Mike Pence has been roundly criticized for not wanting to meet with women by himself.  He does not think it’s appropriate for a man to be in the sole presence of a woman, other than his wife.  For me, as a guy that plays the odds, that calculates risk – I can’t find fault in his thinking.  One misstep on his part, and it’s a he said/she said, and his career could be over.  Not everyone is a Teflon Don(ald Trump).  Self preservation is rule #1.

Now the criticism here is that a woman can’t get ahead in her career, because she can’t get a meeting alone with the boss.

The player in me wonders how a woman really expects to get ahead in her career by being alone with her boss.   What could she say or do with a male boss that shouldn’t do in front of another employee?

So now we have feminism going at it from both ends.  You got women saying that they don’t like to be alone with a boss and women saying that they need to be alone with a boss.

That’s all well and good Archie, but how does that help me?

Glad you asked.

So this tells you about the nature of women.  That whatever it is they say they want, what they really want is POWER.  So now that you understand the power dynamic – you will start to see it everywhere.  She wants both things, both things that are opposites…

You can

  • Call her out on it playfully during the initial pull
  • You can adopt her stance, wait for her to call you on it, and then pull this out. “How is this different than….” – that creates the tension, the push, and you can extend it, until you release it and pull her back in.

Now a lot of you guys are going to use this as an opportunity to spout off your political nonsense.  That’s not what i’m saying.  What you need to focus on with a chick is not “politics”, but culture. How do you handle a situation?

-Archie

Independent Women

Archie – So what do you bring to the table…
*chick interjects*
Chick – I’ve got a degree, a job, my own place, my own car…

Archie – Lemme finish, what do you bring to the table that *I* want?

This question is different.  What I want is not what she deems valuable.  So  what does the average man thinks is valuable?

From a Old G’s perspective, some of the Independent Woman’s criteria is actually useful

  • She has her own place – easy to slide in and out.  She’s not always in your hair, or looking for the upgrade
  • She has her own car – don’t have to always pick her up.
  • She has her own money – no coming out the pocket.

Well a player doesn’t.  most regular dudes end up paying for most everything.  Now a Pimp?  From what I hear *grins* gets the girl to finance her own romance…

What about education?

In some cases a girl’s educational skills can assist you.  If you have a business and she’s an accountant…  Far and Few between.

The real benefit to a chick having a college education is that you don’t want your children raised by a dummy.  Not that you’re trying to have kids when you first meet a chick – but many a dude has been knocked out the game by a knocking up a chick that can barely fill out her 1040.

These are some generic ones.  The traditional feminine arts, like caring, nurturing, nursing, cleaning, cooking, decoration, money and household management – modern technology and society have done damage to these things.  I’m of the age where i’ve had a chick fix a hem in my trousers. (This was the 90’s).  I don’t think basic sewing skills is as widespread as it used to be.

You do have to ask yourself, what do you value in a chick.

The face and the body are given.  A style that can be sexy but can switch to modest is also a given.   Bedroom skills, given.

What else are you after?  That’s some soul searching.

As a caveat – take it from my experience – whatever your hobby is – you don’t necessarily want your love interest involved with that.  Maybe you’re a big comic book fan.

This may seem appealing to you, until you start to understand the work that goes into it, but the sort of attention that your chick is going to get.  if you’ve ever dated a dancer (and I’m not talking tap) – aside from the unwanted male attention, the drudgery of her daily beauty routine will affect you.

On the personal, I like a girl who likes to try new things.  So I try to structure my interactions around novelty.  If she turns her nose up at checking out the Kenyan restaurant – I’m not particularly interested in hearing anything else from her.

So now that you have standards, how do you use this in the game?

Part 2 The Framework

Anytime I’ve said this type of thing to a chick – suggest that her face and body are not enough – She immediately gets flustered.  And as chicks tend to do, she tries to turn it around on me. Because once her pride has been wounded, it’s not about conversation and communication, but about winning.

Point this out – that she’s just trying to one up you instead of trying to connect –  and watch her demoralize even more.

Mystery made this a part of his provocation.

“Beauty is common, what else do you have go l going on other than your looks”

He’d say this early as part of his fake qualification routine, and she’d reply with some typical nonsense. She was then qualifying to him.  And when one person qualifies their worth to someone else – that’s submission.  And the act of qualifying is about seeking approval.  That’s what we want in the validation cycle.

But this is one of those white/black divide cultural things where a white guy is “impressed” by a white girl’s credentials. Often when you see the mainstream pua guys mention these things in their lay reports – they really don’t care what the chick says.  It’s just a part of the dance, where she knows that in order to pull a high level guy – she has to be high level herself.

Her resume reply, the white pua accepts her bullshit answer, and she feels validated when his initial question pushed her away before.

Part 3 Culture

As black dudes, we’ve had to deal with this “independent woman” bullshit since at least Destiny’s Child. Not just as a social phenomenon, but as a tired “line” within the back and forth.

So where a white guy just sorta let’s that shit go and gets the lay, this black dude is triggered! I swear, “I’m like Sweetie you need to come original, just like I have..”

So in practice, if you’ve opened the chick and you’re starting to get into real negotiations –

  • Have something that you actually value
  • Keep your cool
  • Withhold validation, until you actually have a reason to validate her.

-Archie

Pathology

Adapted from a comment that the homey Intro made on the thread.

…There are guys like that too. Who have the pathological need to take a broken chick and take care of her. …. But for a woman it’s definitely an important quality.

I forget the full context of the statement – but this really stuck out to me as something to be discussed.

Not in the context of what’s wrong with other guys – but rather on how  a man goes de-programming himself from harmful patterns that instilled in him as child.

Given what we know now (or at least suspect) about women – It’s easy to knock these dudes.  They just want to save these chicks from themselves.  How did they come to these behaviors? Who told them to do that?

  • Their mothers
  • Society
  • School
  • Religion
  • Culture
  • Media

Unless they ran into a dude like me, WHO HAD TO LEARN THE HARD WAY, or they had access to good game material – saving a chick that’s going in the wrong direction is what they’re going to do.

It’s not only important to have empathy and compassion for the next man, it’s helpful in determining what changes a young player needs to make in his own life.

Some guys are born into the game.
They have bad mothers and they learn not to deify women.  A lot of the famous pimps in history/literature have had mothers that left good men to be with bad men, or manipulated good men in order to get something out of them.  That type of behavior can turn a man’s heart cold.

Now, not every guy with a bad mom learns that.
Oftentimes boys with bad parents, try much harder to please these wayward parents.   It’s the same cycle of abuse with bad relationships.  The “good” person in the relationship will change his own behavior so that the “bad” person will either like them and change her behavior.

The troubling aspect of the game is that a lot of the women we find physically attractive also show this poor behavior. Indeed, when you take looks out of the equation – even a regular chick has some of these traits built into her.  The difference between the average guy and the new player is that the New Player no longer tries to submit to make the girl come around.

Now if a guy wasn’t exposed to these sorts of things, he has to learn game.

But most guys aren’t ever exposed.  What’s worse is that nost guys have no curiosity, no imagination about that stuff.

Taking care of these broken “angels” is just what you do.  You take care of your woman. As natural as gravity.  You be nice. You care for her.

Except that in the game, we’ve all learned that this is the sure fire way to lose the chick.  You don’t treat a chick a the way you want to be treated, the way she ought to be treated, the way she SAYS she wants to be treated – but you treat her in such a way that she RESPONDS TO.

Often what people respond to, is not what society says is right or what they say for themselves.  Passing up on a chick that is good for you, a chick that is good for you, for a chick that’s no good.  The no good broad has something that makes you RESPOND.  You justify whatever you do after the fact.

The closest most guys ever come to understanding the dual nature of a woman is when they see asshole jocks/rich guys  get what they want from women.  But as normal guys do, they tie the change in the woman’s behavior to some other visually identifiable trait of the male.

They see the “poor” behavior, but they think that women find those men attractive regardless of the behavior.

Maybe the regular guy goes one level up, and starts acting like a jerk to attract chicks.  That only takes them so far – because they don’t understand why the
behavior is attractive.

Once you get to the root of it – that behavior is what attracts women – that opens doors.  You start to see.

I can do whatever style of game I want – because what’s ultimately attractive to the chick is this power I have over her to make her react.

No regular guy will ever see that.   Maybe if he gets into sales or leadership. Even then he doesn’t realize what he’s actually doing.

So the takeaways here

  • It’s “natural” to want to save a chick
  • It’s only “natural” because you’ve been programmed that way
  • Deprogram yourself by taking changing your behavior towards women
  • Instead of doing things that you think are right, that society says, that she says – focus your attention on things that make her respond

-Archie